I had a made a new acquaintance a while ago.
We were both concerned about the plight of a classical musician. I sent a couple of letters to him and then....nothing. A few days later, I was surprised to get this mail: “See that existence takes care? And, Ustad has been taken care too?...and you have banned me in less than a week! Didn't like my face? Sorry, for I have only that one.”
I was put on the defensive, as always...I told him that I wondered whether the early note was for me or a general list, for he had not addressed me by name.
Does a name matter? Does anything that defines us and 'specifies' us matter?
Why would I ban him? We all have only the faces we have, so long as we do not mask them.
I told him I was glad that the Ustad has been taken care of…but Existence? That is a beastly instinct.
I mentioned that I was in grey rainy Mumbai and feeling morose for various reasons...perhaps that was the reason I had not responded. Besides, it might have been presumptuous to just start bombarding him with mail...which is why I felt I needed to have something 'sensible' to say...who defines that, though?
His reply was prompt:
“Farzana,It was only for you.
I write only to individuals.
I don't know.
The only thing I know
is that you should be nicer
You are simply too hard
on poor Farzana.
Just accept her the way she is.
And I really mean it!”
Does anyone know how to be nice to oneself?