You enter a restaurant and just when you are half-way through the humongous portions, or merely pausing for breath or to contemplate your fingernails, you will hear a rather chirpy voice asking you, “Are you done?” When your eyes meet his or hers, there will be another salvo, “You still workin’ on it?”
Done? Working on it? I am surprised they don’t tell you, “Righto, enjoy masticating!”
Jaahils! This is food. This is ‘peit puja’. Only we understand the sheer devotion towards a culinary experience. Mind you, I am not talking about some fast-food joint. These were proper places.
At one, the girl waiting tables wore her cap backwards. It was a sushi bar, for god’s sake.
At a restaurant in the genteel 
named Tsunami Relief…Malibu Rum, hypnotiq, pineapple juice. Talk of insensitivity.
A ‘tall’ coffee is a small one. Why? Nobody knows.
If someone asks you, “So, how you doin; today?” you just cannot respond with a tepid, “Fine, thanks.” You have to sound like you have returned from a massage parlour…”Grrreeeaaatt…”
And then there is the other exclamation, more like punctuations.
“Hi there. What can I do fer ya?”
“I need a …”
“Un huh..”
“The names of a few home delivery places…
“Un-huh…”
“So, do you have them?”
“Un huh, jussamoment... Un huh, hey-you-ah”
Names are rattled off.
“Thanks…”
“Un huh…”
“I’ll call them now…”
“Aaan haanh!”
Finally, a climax is reached.
FV:
ReplyDeleteI hope this dislike is only restricted to certain aspects of Amreekan culture only... Not a pathological distaste for all things american...
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ReplyDeletejust like my roadsides dhabas in my punjab of today :-)
ReplyDeletePS:
ReplyDelete'American culture'?? I am afraid I have a distaste for most things Americian. Worry not. The United States is not the poorer for it.
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CresceNet:
I hope someone reads, understands and does whatever you want them to do. Thanks for making me the conduit :-)
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Amandeep:
In dhabas they do what they have to...they do not pretend otherwise.