A 12-year-old Saudi girl unexpectedly gave up her petition for divorce from an 80-year-old man her father forced her to marry in exchange for a dowry. Despite support from human rights lawyers and child welfare advocates, the girl and her mother, who originally sought the divorce, withdrew the case on Monday in a court in Buraidah, in Al-Qasim province.
Who is to blame here? The mother had earlier approached the government’s Human Rights Commission charging that the girl had been raped; the local media reported it. Now she and her daughter have backtracked. This is a social evil and has to be handled at several levels for I believe it is crucial to look at things holistically.
The father is a piece of scum who sold his daughter for 85,000 riyals ($22,667). The groom is a shameless man who not only paid for this nubile bride but also consummated the marriage. Why was the mother quiet initially, then made a noise and has now withdrawn the case? I can only sympathise with the girl. She has been brainwashed about obedience to parents.
If the Saudi government body was willing to intervene, if the case did reach the courts and the media reported it, then do we reproach Saudi Arabia or the social mores or the individuals concerned? How many such examples are there? Do all of them appear in the public eye? What are the compulsions that drive people to do this? We imagine the kingdom to be rich, therefore what sort of greed was at play here?
We have had cases of men way in their dotage lusting after young women even in the West. The matter of choice is usually mentioned, but what choice can we talk about when there is power at play and the young women are hankering after riches and fame, not to speak about coveting even minor luxuries to keep up with the Joneses?
I think not all is lost in this case. The Saudi government should in fact assert itself and drag the father to court as well as the mother. There must certainly be provisions for forcing a minor through pressure tactics. The media has evidence since the mother had approached a journalist. That 80-year-old man needs to be tried too.
There is always talk about how women are not allowed to drive or go unescorted in Saudi Arabia. These are important enough issues at one level. It is more crucial to address how individuals make decisions that reflect badly on a particular society that anyway has a record for being considered regressive, and in some instances rightly so.
It is, however, time we realise that there are watchdogs even in such societies and they should be encouraged rather than buffering what they are fighting against by giving the negative more mileage.
Also, in the fluffy omelettes we may not notice our own bad eggs.
Farzana,
ReplyDeleteall those fancy houdinistic arguments and not a word about law where a minor 12 year old can be sold in marriage to 80 year old by the blessing of religion,state and greedy father.
Yes poor go through many insults and may make poor choices. Sanctioned treatment by nation,religion, no criticism by Farzana when she chose to comment is heart breaking.This is worst than silence.Islam and its followers have to correct its follies from with in .I wonder if your silence is desire not to be blacklisted by Saudi Arabia for Haj Visa on a future date .
It is sad when even i am questioning your motives.Are we all chickens and barking dogs in lions roar.
not a total synic
kul bhushan
rxri.blogspot.com
FV wrote:
ReplyDelete"It is, however, time we realise that there are watchdogs even in such societies and they should be encouraged rather than buffering what they are fighting against by giving the negative more mileage."
Well said. The goal should be to increase the number of such upright people who stand up for everyone in such regressive societies. They will change too, but only if they know why they are changing, and why that change will be good for them.
Most people in India would also refuse to acknowledge the regressiveness in their own thinking....people usually believe their own religious ideology is pure and fair until someone of their own group proves them wrong via their actions -- we see examples of those among both Hindus and Muslims in India.
I would, however, look at Saudi social practices with a extremely wary eye and would resist any moves from the Indian govt. that allows such social practices into India -- India can do well without that.
ReplyDeleteFor example, Male Chauvinism in India is an ugly fact that will only go away with economic empowerment of women, and India needs social practices that push India in that direction, not away from it.
FV
ReplyDeleteI won't go in to detail about Saudi sick culture. However I will blame Saudi Govt., Saudi culture and also Islam to let an 80 years old filthy man rape a 12 years old girl. What else can I say?
This is not even shocking any more coming from Saudis.
circle
Al:
ReplyDeleteYou got the spirit of what I was saying. There are upright people in every society, but we must also accept that each society has its own specific limitations and ‘differences’.
Most people in India would also refuse to acknowledge the regressiveness in their own thinking....people usually believe their own religious ideology is pure and fair until someone of their own group proves them wrong via their actions -- we see examples of those among both Hindus and Muslims in India.
Absolutely. But why do we see social acts – criminal or otherwise – only through the religious prism? If I throw some dirt in my building, a neighbour will tick me off. It has to do with civic sense.
I would, however, look at Saudi social practices with a extremely wary eye and would resist any moves from the Indian govt. that allows such social practices into India -- India can do well without that.
Where has India officially sought the Saudi model? What social practices are you referring to? Or do you mean legal punishment? We do have people in India wanting to chop off hands of criminals, and we had cops who blined villagers in Bhagalpur for no crime. We don’t have to worry about Saudi practices as long as they do not enter our domain. As the West’s have done.
…Male Chauvinism in India is an ugly fact that will only go away with economic empowerment of women, and India needs social practices that push India in that direction, not away from it.
Agree about male chauvinism that manifests itself in different forms, often under the garb of ‘intellectual’ discourse and personal attacks. I do not believe, however, that economic empowerment is the only way out. But that’s a long essay.
Circle:
You have been here long enough. Your views have changed. I hope you read the post and the issues it talked about. I did refer to it as legalised paedophilia and most of the stuff you state, but just saying Saudi this and Saudi that is not a solution, unless they are at your door.
Btw, does anyone even care about the religion of that guy who was referred to as the ‘monster dad’?
FV wrote:
ReplyDelete"Where has India officially sought the Saudi model? What social practices are you referring to? Or do you mean legal punishment? "
Sorry I was not clear, Farzana. I just meant that India needs to be careful about how money/influence from countries like Saudi Arabia spread in India. India has a hugely diverse population that will not be served well by influences that run counter to the nature of the Indian polity. For example, there was recent news that Wakf boards could be influenced by money from Saudi Charities -- that sort of thing is worrying and was what I was referring to.
Clearly, the GoI is not going to rewrite our constitution for a foreign country, but I realize that what I wrote came across that way.
"We do have people in India wanting to chop off hands of criminals, and we had cops who blined villagers in Bhagalpur for no crime."
ReplyDeleteIndia's implementation of law and order is pretty abyssmal, but you are right that implementationwise, Indian citizens are treated just as cruelly by the state as Saudi Arabia in some instances. Bihar was particularly lawless in those days (as was the rest of India, coming to think of it). I think it has become better now, though Orissa and Naxal-infested regions seem to be equally lawless.
I would be interested in your view of how male chauvinism is exhibiting itself in Indian society nowdays, if your thoughts meander in that direction at some point. Thanks.
FV
ReplyDeleteMy views about saudi Islam never changed, got more reformed. I am answering your question where you asked us ? who to blame?
Clearly, blame goes to saudi laws( they're Islamic shria laws as per Saudi govt.)
No, saudis can't knock at my door. Electric wire is wrapped around my door.
cricle
Al:
ReplyDeleteThanks for clarifying. The Waqf Boards do not have social influence. Muslims, like the rest of the castes, are thankfully divided and have their own checks and balances. The Deobandis in UP try their stupid edicts on hapless women, but I have to keep repeating it that a fatwa is an opinion of a group of people and not necessarily sanctified by the religion.
S.Arabia does not have much to gain by influencing IMs, and IMs are not as vulnerable.
The GOI has to work within the Constitution and it often does not. As you pointed out, implementation fo law leaves much to be desired. I will not compare two vastly disparate societies, but, yes, within what our legal system promises, we have failed.
I write often about male, and female, chauvinism. So, you might bump into it, perhaps subtly, one of these days!
Circle:
The change is not only about Saudi Islam. But never mind.
My blog post was talking about individual responsibility, the media and society outside the law. It is important to understand that, say, if any of our citizens commit crimes we want castration etc. This is a convenient way of looking at things.
By the Saudis at your door, I did not mean your individual door. The doors of our societies and how mch they can get influenced. We in the subcontinent are more influenced by paris Hilton and McDonald’s rather than anything Saudi.
If you have the time, do read this piece:
http://farzana-versey.blogspot.com/2009/09/saudi-arabia-outside-veil.html