2.1.12

Why women don't rape men


A minister “personally” does not favour women wearing certain kinds of clothes. Bad enough. Worse is that Yahoo India has this discussion titled: “The Big Question: Are women to blame for rape?”

Why repeat such an idea? It could have been worded differently, instead of such a passive manner. E.g. “Are men such jerks that they rape women’s clothes?” Seriously, how many times do we have to repeat that fully clothed women, not wearing trendy or flimsy westernised dresses, are raped?

Karnataka’s women and child welfare minister C C Patil said:

“I personally don’t favour women wearing provocative clothes and always feel they need to be dignified in whatever they wear…Today’s lifestyle makes it mandatory for women to work like men and live on equal terms with them. So women work in IT companies and call centres at night, they ought to know how much skin they should cover when they leave for such work places. Thus, I leave the issue of their dressing to them.”

Well, thanks, but we should drop the term ‘moral policing’ for morality is the big culprit that starts these stereotypes, and policing assumes they have the power. There is another issue that we are not addressing. What does he mean by saying that it has become mandatory for women to work. It is as much a choice as any other, and it has little to do with aping men. If that were the case then women would be doing the dhinka-chika pelvic thrust, keeping their shirt/blouse buttons open till the waist.


Why don’t women rape men? After all, in many animal species it is the female that hunts prey, and a few smart insects even devour their mate after mating. I won’t get into the nurturing argument. Women’s brains are where they are supposed to be – in their heads. They may get attracted to men and their bodies but they do not lunge. There can be an element of lust when they eye someone, but they do not lick their lips.

Besides the tired argument about conditioning (how many of us are told not to look at men in that way?), women tend to be more individualistic in their thinking, even where sexist ideas are concerned. Men are more likely to follow the herd, which is why gang rape is quite common, often in places where women in fact do work similar to men: in the fields.

The female construct of conquest is not just about security, but exclusivity. Women gossip, but they rarely discuss their bedroom tales with their friends. Ask men and chances are that long after it is over, they will still be tied to the G-strings.

8 comments:

  1. Farzana:

    "... Women gossip, but they rarely discuss their bedroom tales with their friends..."

    I think you are stretching a bit. My girl friend's friend would remind me of what they knew about "us". My GF would boldly proclaim it to be their right and how I should mind my business.

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  2. In this case, I am not stretching it. There will be exceptions. Besides, maybe the GF's friend just wanted to show control and the GF agreed because of fealty to her friend and also a realisation about such 'rights'.

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  3. In this case, I am not stretching it. There will be exceptions. Besides, maybe the GF's friend just wanted to show control and the GF agreed because of fealty to her friend and also a realisation about such 'rights'.

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  4. >>>a few smart insects even devour their mate after mating.

    saves lawyer fees fer sure :)

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  5. And, Hitesh, the rare instance when women can say they can digest their spouse!

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  6. You seem to be saying, "Girls are better than boys. Boys are jerks, they think with their dicks. Girls are nice and smart." This argument about which is the superior sex is best left to kids in high-school.

    As for that question about why women don't rape, the answer isn't in the domain of intellectual superiority, but of anatomy. I have great difficulty visualizing a female cat or dog taking a male by force. You?

    Insects devouring their mates don't count. That's cannibalism, not rape.

    Krish

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  7. Actually, women do rape men. According to the latest CDC survey, 4.8% of all men were "made to penetrate" and 79.2% of the perpetrators were women.
    An example of "made to penetrate" is a woman who has sex with a man who is passed-out drunk. There is some confusion is due to the fact that their definition of rape excluded "made to penetrate" and only included men who had been penetrated. That was far less common (1.4% of men) and was mostly perpetrated by men. However, if you include "made to penetrate" as rape, which you should, since it is forced sex, the majority of male rape victims were raped by women. You can read the report at:
    http://www.cdc.gov/ViolencePrevention/pdf/NISVS_Report2010-a.pdf

    Here are direct quotes from the report:
    "Approximately 1 in 21 men (4.8%) reported that they were made to penetrate someone else during their lifetime"

    "For three of the other forms of sexual violence, a majority of male victims reported only female perpetrators: being made to penetrate (79.2%), sexual coercion (83.6%), and unwanted sexual contact (53.1%)."

    Here are some stories from male victims: http://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/v73r4/men_who_have_been_raped_by_women_can_you_tell_us/

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  8. Egalitarian:

    Thank you for the comment and the information.

    I am afraid that although I understand "made to penetrate" and its implications, it is not quite the same as rape of women, especially as a power game, as perpetrated by gangs, on infants and the elderly.

    I do not condone any sort of force, however, and men who have been abused have equal right to justice.

    ---

    Krishnaraj Rao:

    I think your reading reveals that limitation. If we leave such discussions to high school, then unfortunately many kids are victims too.

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