Hindus, Muslims and a Toilet

Next time I want to become part of the ‘mainstream’ I will wear red bracelets. If any of you thought that Hinduism was associated with saffron, then according to the ISI’s Major Iqbal it is not quite so. It is red. The Left parties are still nursing wounds and here some Pakistani even takes away their colour. Oh, but the Hindutvawadis had also taken away the hammer during Babri no? And maybe the sickle during the excavation? Commies are bereft and all because of the ISI.

One more story on the David Headley 'investigation'. He bought 15 red bracelets to be worn by the attackers so that they could disguise themselves as Hindus. This is part of the evidence and I can imagine those American backpacker tourists saying, “Yeah, yeah, that’s wotwesaah at those aahsim taimpills.”

I saw Shakti Kapoor wearing one. At the Ajmer dargah. Every religion has this red thread/bracelet thing, okay? Honestly, can we get serious about this? Would the Indian intelligence authorities look at the wrists of suspects? Next they will say people with varicose veins are chosen to be disguised as green Muslims.

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Smita Thackeray has complimented Muslims for not being swayed by LeT and al Qaida. What to do, Smitaji. We only sway when we are drunk.

“It is a matter of great satisfaction that Muslims have retained faith in India’s unity and communal harmony.”

Gee, thanks. Now your turn.

“The prayers of Hindus and Muslims will shield Balasaheb from any threat. The Ajmal Kasabs, Ranas and David Headleys can’t touch him, Sonia-ji or Manmohan Singh.”

What about atheists?

Ms. Thackeray’s new-found interest is because she is making a film called Babri on Babri. She insists it will be from the common man’s perspective. Of course. I should hope to see a lot of Behrampada, of Madhukar Sarpotdar and the arms, of people being made to pull down their pants in cosmopolitan Mumbai, of honest cops who were transferred. It can all be fictionalised.

Incidentally, Aamir Khan has helped her with the script. This is one common man we can wash our hands of and who will do anything to market anything.

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I do not know of many people who if they need to go the loo will take the name of the toilet. Will someone who happens to be in the Bhuleshwar area and wishes to use the facilities say, “I want to go to Kasturba Gandhi”?

No. But we have to create a noise. One bloke is angry because of one such toilet name:

“This is my fight because the public seems to be afraid to speak up. I think the British (appear in a better light) at this point since they named the road after Kasturba Gandhi, thus honouring her. We, on the other hand, have done the opposite and degraded her.”

Her husband degraded her long ago when he gave her a broom and expected her to clean lavatories. Mahatma Gandhi had great respect for ‘toilet training’. The self-righteousness by citizens is unnecessary. Shit happens, so no need to get pissed off.

Will Sonia divorce Manmohan? Or Digvijay?

The problem with these educated politicians is that they think they are being clever and don’t realise that those quotes they bark out could bite them.

Why is everyone so chuffed about Prime Minister Manmohan Singh’s Shakespearean reference? This came about at the final session of the 83rd AICC plenary when he said he was ready to face questions by the Joint Parliamentary Committee on the 2G spectrum probe:

“I wish to state categorically that I have nothing to hide from the public at large and as a proof of my bona fides, I intend to write to chairman of the PAC (Public Accounts Committee) that I shall be happy to appear before the PAC if it chooses to ask me to do so. I sincerely believe that like Caesar’s wife, the Prime Minister should be above suspicion.”

Aye, aye, sire. Forsooth thou forgeteth the dark shadow of seduction. Caesar Sonia had already laid the ground by emphasising Dr (Pompeia) Singh’s strengths, but King Julius had divorced his wife despite her not being implicated because “Caesar’s wife should be above suspicion”. He did not want her to be paraded before a committee. He struck before that and pre-empted any doubts and stood up for probity, instead of getting the linen washed in public to prove there were no stains.

To mix my Bard a bit, the PM ought to have chosen Macbeth’s wife and merely uttered, “Out, damned spot”. For, the blood may be illusory but the swift murder of integrity haunts.

There is still time for the Ides of March and the elections.

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Et tu Brute?

 

And while we are at it, is Digvijay stabbing the Congress in the back with his kindness? I am afraid that even though I agree with his views on the RSS and saffron terror, he may land in big trouble for pushing it:

"The RSS in the garb of its nationalist ideology is targetting Muslims the same way Nazis targetted Jews in the 1930s.”

It is obvious to anybody that he could not possibly be literal. The RSS and the rest of the Hindutva parties have often expressed their admiration for Hitler; they use the swastika as their symbol and they also have the same form of salute. They believe in the supremacy of culture as seen from the majoritarian point of view and their dream is a Ram Rajya.

However, it is a known fact that the Jews are touchy about their suffering under the Nazis and also very possessive about it. Immediately after Digvijay’s statement, an Israel embassy spokesperson said:

“Without entering the political debate, no comparison can be made with the Nazi Holocaust in which six million Jews were massacred solely because they were Jewish.”

Of course, the numbers and the manner of those killings were horrendous. But, I do not see why the reference should cause the embassy such a problem. Is it because the people compared here happen to be Muslim and they have a huge baggage with regards to Palestine, which is now seen as a Muslim issue? Why this need to hold on to their tragedy as though such cruelty inflicted on them is to be patented?

With this overt protest, the Congress party could be in a spot. It is not dealing with Holocaust memories or the Israeli embassy or even Israel; it is dealing with the United States of America. Deep shit. Don’t forget that following the Mumbai attack of 26/11 in which the Jewish Chabad House was one of the targets, by an ‘Islamist’ group it may be emphasised, we have become extremely cautious. Had you ever seen Jews distributing sweets on Hanukah before, that too outside the Gateway of India? This year you did. It is the Obama-Israel-Manmohan triangle that will be at work. We have to consider the nuclear deal, the fight against terror and the global economy.

"Though this be madness, yet there is method in 't."

(From Hamlet)

Rahul Gandhi, Saffron Terrorism and America

Time to come out

Had anyone heard Rahul Gandhi talk about ‘Hindu terrorism’ before? Then why is everyone jumping the gun and accusing him of vote-bank politics? Will the saffron leaders make up their minds whether he is trying to get Muslim votes or that he should not have talked to a foreign diplomat? Were these parties not crowing just the other day about how in Nitish Kumar’s economic paradise, Bihar, Muslims voted for him just as they had done in Narendra Modi’s Gujarat? So, why are they getting into a tizzy?

Closing ranks - Uma Bharti with the BJP's Lalji Tandon

Uma Bharti wants Rahul to learn history, and indeed he should, just as much as she should not only learn history but also stop telling lies. And denying the existence of saffron terrorism. History is Nathuram Godse. History is the Jan Sangh that was in opposition to the Muslim League even before the Partition. History is that religious politics has been around.

I again wish to point out, as I have done earlier, that these WikiLeaks cable reports are quoting western diplomats. In this case:

(Rahul) Gandhi is reported to have told US ambassador Timothy Roemer although “there was evidence of some support (for the LeT) among certain elements in India's indigenous Muslim community, the bigger threat may be the growth of radicalized Hindu groups, which create religious tensions and political confrontations with the Muslim community”.

Where would she be without them? Sadhvi Pragya with the BJP top leadership

Is this not true? While Jammu and Kashmir has seen outside infiltration, we cannot ignore the local militant groups and the role of the security forces, whether there are WikiLeaks about it or not. And no one can deny the polticisation of the armed forces during the BJP regime. That was a very real threat. Sadhvi Pragya was with an armyman.

Incidentally, it is Muslims who should be raising their voices since he has mentioned support to LeT from the indigenous Muslim community (and not even ‘radicalised Muslim groups’). But, we shall let that pass because not everyone can be in denial.

Anyhow, compare the casualties caused by the Lashkar-e-Taiba in the rest of India with those in communal riots. Don’t the figures speak for themselves?

Here are some quotes:

“If he sees a fringe group as the biggest threat…it only underscores how ignorant he is about India.”

         - Ravi Shankar Prasad, BJP

The BJP, VHP, RSS, Bajrang Dal, Shiv Sena are fringe groups? Don’t try and divert attention. He mentioned the radicalised political groups and everyone knows about the support they get. As much as the LeT gets from the powers in Pakistan.

“It is ‘shocking’…there is a race among senior Congress leaders to project Hindus as terrorists.”

- RSS

This should have happened long ago. It is unfortunate that the RSS is branding all Hindus and assuming they support this sad little organisation. Just as not all Muslims will support the Jamaat-e-whatever and the Indian Mujahideen. Hindutva parties must fight the Congress for its role in communal politics as and when it actually takes place. But at that time these parties are busy doing their own ballot dancing.

“They don’t know what the Hindu ethos stands for. To call Hindu groups more dangerous that the LeT is the product of a sick mind.”

- Prakash Javdekar, BJP

Is the BJP in charge of the Hindu ethos? It is a way of life, isn’t it? It is about karma, isn’t it? So, let the Hindus decide what ethos they wish to follow. I don’t know how exactly Rahul Gandhi has been quoted, but since he has stood by the general comment, I’d like to state that any person with some perspective can see that ‘more dangerous’ is contextual. It also means that the BJP is not denying anything.

Narendra Modi - the economy is at the tip of his sword

One can safely aver that had he said that it was less dangerous the effect would have been the same.

Some have said that he should have shown maturity while talking to a foreign diplomat. Had he said something really nasty about the Indian Mujahideen would anyone have questioned his maturity?

I am pleasantly surprised he dropped all inhibitions to state this. Consider the background. The US plays Pakistan rather well and knows pretty much what it is up to. He has given them another headache to worry about. This has nothing to do with vote-bank politics, but the survival of the Congress party’s supremacy in Indo-US cooperation. If America says, “Fight terrorism”, then the Congress will shoot back that we will be with you, Uncle Sam, but help us out to deal with our opposition.

I’d say, this is a new mature Rahul Gandhi, and never mind what you will watch in the debates on TV tonight. All that frothing will create minor studio storms. The Gandhi guy has ensured that the pool of still waters will run deep into the US mindset. He is not interested in what Indians think.

I won’t vote for him, but I’ll lend him my ear.