News meeows - 22

Jail Bharo

You are in an Indian prison. Why can’t you get anything non-vegetarian?

The Bombay high court raised this query rapping the prison authorities for this discriminatory attitude. “When you can consider the tastes of a foreigner, why can’t you show the same consideration to Indian prisoners?’’

Foreigners in prison are served bread, butter and eggs. Here is an exchange that took place.

Public prosecutor: “They were not used to eating chappatis.”

Judge: “All Indians don’t eat the same food. Revise your rules and make room for every taste.’’

Ah, Kasab will now get his biryani. But seriously, would any Indian, Pakistani, Nigerian, Korean serving time in a prison in the West be granted culinary grace? Are foreigners given forks and spoons (knives would be out)? These days they have taken big-time to Indian food and curries, so they can jolly well eat some dal and chappati. And anyway the prison ones are as thick as pita bread. Just mash the chholey and call it humus. Puree the tomatoes, add a dash of mirch masala and finely-chopped onions and you have salsa.

And for their chai time, are the firangs offered Earl Grey or English breakfast? Is it coffee and do they prefer a frothy cappuccino or an Espresso?

Mera Bharat Mulligatawny…


Do churches encourage conversions? Maybe. Maybe not. Conversions have always existed. But attacks on churches have just increased in the past few years.

Outside Bangalore, in a church two statues were broken and glass panes damaged; they tried to set a car on fire but were unsuccessful.

Infuriated by the attack, 350 followers of the church blocked the Bangalore-Hosur Road on Thursday morning, leading to traffic jam for hours…church followers called it a well-organised attack.

The police are “looking into the matter”. What got my goat was the state home minister V S Acharya saying that some antisocial elements were trying to create disharmony.

Of course. We are a peace-loving nation, living in harmony. Remember Orissa?


A stampede in a New Delhi school results in the death of five students; 35 are injured and four critically.

Initial reports said a rumour about electric charge in water led to the stampede, but locals refuted it saying that the area had no power supply at the time of the incident. The stampede took place when students were trying to make their way up and down a narrow staircase when they were asked to shift classrooms flooded with rain water during an examination. Around 1,300 students had come for the examination in heavy downpour.

This is unfortunate and bizarre. When there is flooding, the students should be asked to go home. If there is a shift suggested, then someone ought to be in charge of seeing that it is carried out in an orderly manner. Why were no teachers injured? Where were they?

Chief minister Sheila Dikshit has announced compensation of Rs one lakh to the next of kin of the dead and Rs 50,000 each to the injured.

I am aware that the government can do just this much; after all, we need to take care of our defence budget. But these were young people who had a long way to go; many would have supported their families.

Boxer’s Day

Barely had he delivered the winning punch to become the first Indian to make it the last-four stage of the prestigious World Championships and boxer Vijender Singh has already signed a million-dollar sponsorship deal with the Percept Sports Management Company.

It is good that a not-pampered sport is bringing us accolades. It is good that boxers too are getting endorsements. But Vijender has already become the media’s darling not only because he is good-looking but because he speaks English haltingly. Everyone’s heart goes out to the Jat with thaat. Yeah. He has got attitude. And that’s what matters.

Good for him. Now how about the sponsors shelling out some money for athletes to get some accommodation and facilities to practise so that they can get us much more? Buy them if you must, you vultures.

Wedding off her back

A Surat bride gets her back painted

I find this quite an ugly sight. The bride's skin has been painted completely in that portion and stands in contrast to the rest of her natural colour. Damn, it is not even some flowery design or a peacock feather pattern. Like, what is it for? Each time she turns, the groom can get a high seeing another woman’s face? Is this some sort of threesome fantasy being realised?

Perhaps, they can instead have a you-know-what sketched so that he knows you-know-what to wear when…


  1. Sheila Dixit and her Son are busy making flyovers on every single Xing in Delhi as long as WB gives loan and they get their cut...but schools are not a part of commonwealth games prepration ...so let kids die. Anyway if they were kids of any consequence , they would have to gone "International" schools owned by Congress Politicians...
    She has made enough money and should retire now as Governer of Mizoram
    On this whole Conversion piece, why the heck all Hindu are target of conversion, someone needs to think ...simple because we are in a mess.....Because we are so in a state of intellactual hibernation ...you are still figuring out if a Kashmiri Pandit is the same as Iyengar Brahmin or a Kannadiga Lingayat is the same as Punjabi Saraswat,To top it all , the sri sris and The asa rams make it even more messy. Time to reinvent the Religion to increase the escape velocity rather than throwing stones

  2. Manish:

    A welcome back to you...

    Yes of course it is all about status, which is why I find it difficult to swallow how our system works stuff.

    The same status thing works with conversions. It is poor Hindus and dalits. All religions are messy, in that they have some disparities. It is stupid to make distinctions even within groups, though. Hinduism, being polytheistic, is more amenable. But then, there is a trend towards moving away from one's faith even internationally.

    I tell you, this is the right time to start my ashram:)

  3. This is one of the things that has always angered me. Indians will always overlook their own people to service the goras. Maybe it stems from the atithi devo bhava sanskaar!!!

  4. Ah, but Indians eat more of the ladoos than they serve...I guess prisons have a 'slimming' style to follow.

    Btw, if the guest is god, then why don't we flirt with gods?

  5. Hehe...we do more than just flirt with these "gods".


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