“Hal-lo?”
“Hallow, how have you been?”
“I am fine. Who..”
“It’s me, Draupadi.”
“Are you wearing a saree?”
“Ha, ha, no dice.”
“Come on, tell me honestly. I also play chess with Jaya.”
“Oh…”
“Don’t sound upset.”
“Why bring Jaya in, munchkin?”
“I said I play with Vijay…you are doctoring the conversation.”
“I am just feeling low. We are talking after a long time”
“I’ve been very busy in Kurukshetra, it’s tough.”
“So when are we meeting?”
“When do want to meet baby? I will make time.”
“Okay sweetie.”
“It’s so nice of you to remember me.”
“I tau always remember you.”
“An old man, a fossil.”
“I don’t think age really matters, does it?”
“It matters between the legs.”
“Ha, ha, ha, god.”
“Reminds me, what is happening to your five husbands?”
“Don’t ask. I am fed up with them. It is like coalition politics.”
“But you were rewarded, na?”
“What reward? There is Bhima who has the power of elephants, so what am I to do? Yudhishtira is wise, but lives in the mind. Arjuna has courage and his aim was better with the fish. Nakul and Sahdeva are gorgeous, but they go to the river to look at themselves.”
“You have more than you can handle?”
“Oh, sweetie, you know I can handle a lot. Just that in all this reward-award, I did not get a man who could entertain me.”
“So sad, baby. I swing both ways – do politics and business.”
“That’s why you are so interesting, buttercup. Age has nothing to do with it.”
“Nice of you to say that. Reminds me of that old Hindi song ‘Piya tu, ab tou aaja’.”
“It is a cabaret number.”
“No. It is very deep. It is how with a little nasha anything can happen.”
“Ha, ha…when are we meeting?”
“Soon. Have to sort few problems.”
“Serious?”
“That Mulayam…”
“Too soft he was, na?”
“Arre, baba, someone will be listening to this phone call.”
“Who?”
“Anil.”
“Why is he so important?”
“Because of Tina.”
“Tina too calls?”
“No because There Is No Alternative.”
“Ha, ha. You are lucky then. I have so many and am yet unhappy.”
“My motto is phool khilein hai gulshan gulshan. Let flowers bloom.”
“Yes, We will stay in touch…”
Phone goes silent. Draupadi’s on hold. Amar Singh returns after a few seconds.
“What happened?”
“Another call, baby.”
“Hmm…”
“Shanti.”
“Who Shanti?”
“I want shanti.”
“Whattt?”
- - -
For those who do not know, politician Amar Singh, who has an uncanny ability to be in the news or stay in the news, had earlier talked about the controversial taped conversations with the lawyer-activist father-son duo Prashant and Shanti Bhushan. Now some of the other tapes of his chats with politicians, business tycoons and film stars have been released. The one that has currently grabbed most attention is with someone who calls herself Bipasha, assuming it to be the actress. I have seen/heard precious little of her, but I would rather go along with her denial. Some of the sentences are from the taped chat. The release of these tapes will now permit others to come out. Amar Singh has not denied it is his voice, although he has mentioned editing. I guess his body parts cannot be edited. To his credit he says he is no saint and answerable only to his wife. For the personal conversation, yes. If it has to do with other deals, then no.
The above light-hearted spoof, I must clarify, is to highlight the nature of ‘crowded’ and unethical politics.The italicised portions are verbatim from the 'original'.
- - -
If you are interested, in the content of the tape here it is: http://youtu.be/c9mJqVSCtbY
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