Dry TV, wet Dostana

There is no television these days, since there is a strike. I am a dinnertime couch potato, so I am doing what everyone is – surfing channels. Yesterday I sat through some college romance. The same old stuff is still going on – woman dropping papers, guy picking it up, eyes meeting and then there is love.

I saw a re-run of some mythological serial and wondered if god was all about flying objects then UFOs make a lot of sense.

The news channels are by far worse than I thought. The Hindi shows are called Khabardar and such…then all debates have the same people saying the same things, dressing the way they always do.

They are truly more entertaining than the soaps. There is drama – the narco tests are major; religion – the sadhus, sadhvi, mullahs all talking about nothing; emotion – anger, tears, laughter, greed, you got it all; human interest – here is the journo who holds the mike like a lollipop, and seems to have that mental age, taking you to a poor man’s house. Camera pans to utensils, and grimy walls which are mostly blue. I have no clue why. Then poor man says something about poverty; poor woman uses saree pallu and sniffs and says the same thing. This is gender equality. Back to Ms/Mr. Lollipop (gender equality, yoo-hoo) who says we just saw how poor they are.

They take us back to the chaka-chak chamakta studio where someone will show us graphs about poverty and there may be a panel discussion – one suited man, one in khadi kurta, one woman in slightly stylish clothes, who will be a psychologist, and the other in a saree or salwaar kameez with long earrings, most likely an academician, who will disagree with the psychologist, the suit and the khadi kurta because she does not like all these.

There will be some jerky images of more rooms with utensils and suddenly you will see them being scrubbed and come out looking shiny. Turns out this is an ad for a dishwashing soap bar.

I can’t tell the difference most times.

Now news channels have a last segment which promotes a film. The current favourite is Dostana. Presenting to you a review without seeing the film

- - -

Dostana is based on two guys looking for accommodation in Miami; they decide to portray themselves as gay because of some stupid reason. The landlady is a chic woman and they both fall in love with her…blah-blah…

I believe it is an entertaining film. It has many laughs. Good.

From what I read the gay jokes are being given a thumbs up because mainstream Bollywood has done it. So what? Mainstream Bollywood shows all kinds of relationships.

What concerns me is that it had to be a pretence; it wasn’t a serious relationship. They may not poke fun at gays (and hello, isn’t it time the gay community began to take a bit of humour?) but they do not have the courage to be gay, really gay.

And what about the woman? She has a pad in Miami that she is letting out, so she has made some decisions on her own. Why is it that for one who is quite hip she seems comfortable only around gay men? This is the same old cliché.

I am stuck with male homosexuality because, unfortunately, women are not really sought to be a force even here. Don’t throw Fire at me. This was frustration with the spouses that drove the women to do a bit of massaging. Why must it always be a reaction to patriarchy?

- - -

Time for my dose of suit-kurta-earrings and barf. Wait…I shall watch a film only for one song. Safar for:

Jeevan se bhari teri aankhein
Majboor kare jeene ke liye