On Rahul Gandhi and the five-year warranty

I am sick of the way the electronic media went on about the Rahul Gandhi press conference. Ooh…he is talking about keeping his options open…he is coming into his own…who is better, Rahul or Priyanka?…is he now the voice of the Congress?...oooh, he is such a dimpled darling…

Does this mean charisma? Look, if you want to cater to the lowest common denominator, don’t mess around with important national issues.

Rahul Gandhi gave a press conference because he was acting as spokesperson for his party. He is the leader of the Youth Congress. He may become prime minister one day, which is not like playing Nostradamus…and charisma is quiet something else. Jayalalitha has it. And she is way different.

What if he talks about alliances. We have sundry people from the party on panel discussions alluding to these. So? The only one who came out with the most obvious comment was N.Ram, who said, “The Congress would have to ally with someone or the other.” Yeah. But saying this would cut down on airtime and the rest would not be able to go hmm…haw…haw-haw-haw…

And what does ‘coming into his own’ mean? And what is this whole sister-brother fight about? These are the same people who crib about dynastic politics and then they sit and ‘deconstruct’ it with their pip squeaking.

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If you are in Delhi, then you are blessed. Go to a bar, a toy shop, a water park, heck, anywhere and they will offer you discounts if you have voted or plan to vote.

Here are some deals:

Across Delhi, retailers are offering a flood of discounts, ostensibly to encourage the potential voter to... well... vote. From May 7-10, Louis Philippe is giving 20% off on all purchases as part of its “Luxury to Vote” drive. Bausch and Lomb is offering 5,000 students who’ve voted in Delhi and Chennai pairs of daily disposable contact lenses free. Bikanervala restaurants are knocking 15% off from the bill. On May 8-9, Noida’s hip nightclub Elevate promises free entry and a buy-one-get-one-free on drinks. Showing your finger was never more fun. “Children will force parents to go to polling centres,” says Sanjeev Mehra, president, Khan Market Traders Association, and owner of Allied Stores, a toy shop that has a 10% discount on as part of Khan Market’s “Vote for Democracy Discount’’ promotion. A total of 50 stores are offering discounts ranging from 5% to 30%, says Mehra. He adds that the HDFC branch at Khan Market will be giving away gifts including travel bags and cheque-book covers to account holders who’ve voted. “We wanted to reward customers who’ve taken the trouble to vote and also encourage the young to participate,” says Sunil Gadgil, general manager, Bausch and Lomb.

Oh, so it was such a trouble to go and vote that now the citizens of our country need to be rewarded. You think these shopkeepers care? The freebies and sops will get them more customers, business will thrive, and the young who were not interested in contact lenses or drinking will now get the hang of it…

Shall we say India Shining again?

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If this isn't bad enough we have Adnan Sami’s wife, who has filed a divorce petition and a FIR against him, saying that his father was “responsible for killing a lot of Indian soldiers and had even been honoured by the Pakistan government with the Sitara-i-jur’ar title for the killings’’.

Could be since he was a former Pakistan defence commander and had been in service during the 1965 war against India. One is touched by the lady’s concern for Indian soldiers and am sure she knew about it when she married Adnan the first time (she married him again after an earlier divorce). Why has it become so important now? I am not suggesting that her allegations against him are untrue…that is a different thing altogether. But, she is trying to gain public sympathy. How did she get this information? Obviously her influential family knew about it. And then it is public knowledge since she quotes from his book, 3 Presidents and an Aide—Life, Power and Politics.

She also says that Adnan did not attend the launch function in Delhi because it would mess up his career. You heard it right. This book was launched in Delhi, which is the capital of India. Obviously, we are not as interested in our Indian soldiers as this lady is, who is not Indian.

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Did anyone notice this ad?



It is a rather exploitative use of the ink dot shaped like a car battery.

The country is “zero maintenance”? It has an “automotive battery”? And a “5-year warranty”. Aren’t we lucky? But this is only if we have a car…India’s vast majority doesn’t.

Moral of the story: It’s all about wheels. Within wheels.