Ramgopal Verma ka Constitution

“I have no idea who Anna Hazaare is as I don't keep track of anyone except for film people and gangsters. I don't know what he is fasting for because I don't know what he or anybody else in the whole world is up to as I am too busy in my film work.”

- Film director Ramgopal Verma

When everyone is “charged up”, his comment most certainly lightens up the atmosphere, especially with so many factions and so much fractiousness already visible. Here’s some freewheeling - the backgrounder and more is in the footnote):

Anupam Kher calls up Ramgopal Verma. “Hello, hello?”


“My name is Kher. Anupam Kher.”

“I don’t know Anna Hazare.”

Hangs up and returns to looking at pictures of starlets to cast in his new film.

Phone rings again.

“Hallo? Halla Bol!”


“Mee Ramdas Athavale boltoy.”

“I don’t know Anna Hazare.”

Hangs up and returns to looking at pictures of starlets to cast in his new film.

Phone rings again.

“Halo? Halo?”


“Ha, ha, ha! Namaskar. Main Baba Ramdev hoon na.”

“I don’t know Anna Hazare.”

“Never mind. Aap ki filmon se woh haddiyon ki idea milee (I got the idea about using bones for yogic healing from your films).”

“Send royalty cheque please.”

“Ab tak Umaid Bhavan mein nahin gaya (I have not been to the royal palace Umaid Bhavan yet), wahaan tau Hollywood shaadiyan hoti hai.”

“I don’t know shaadi. Why call? Am busy and I don’t know you.”

“Lekin Mallika Sherawat ko jaante honge.(But you must know Mallika Sherawat)”

“Who is Mallika Sherawat?”

“Film star, mere blessings bohat leti hai yogasana ke liye (She takes my blessings for yoga asanas)”

“Ess, ess, I know fillim star. She is taking blessing to do yoga?”

“Nahin. To be a better person.”

“What is wrong with her now?”

“Better, better, everyone wants to be better. Yeh life ka neeyam hai (this is the rule of life)”

“I don’t know rules.”

“Pataa hai, aapki filmon mein clearly dikhta hai (I can see it clearly in your films)”

“Why you called? I don’t know yoga.”

“I am having trouble with An…”

“I don’t know Anupam Kher.”

“Oh, woh tau Constitution pheinkna chahta tha are Athavale ke log uske ghar par paththar pheinke (He wanted to throw out the Constitution and Ramdas Athavale’s people pelted stones at his house).”

“I don’t know the Constitution. He can keep it or do what he wants and I don’t know stones so they can do what they want.”

“Aap Bharat mata ke putra hai. (You are the son of mother India.)”

“I don’t know putra.”

“Yeh sab aag phaila rahe hai. (They are only spreading fire)”

“I did it, I made film on Sholay.”

“Aap Sholay ko jaante hai? Hum prasann hue (You know Sholay? I am thrilled.)”

“No. I don’t know Sholay, only made film.”

“Tau theek hai. Ab Ann…”

“I don’t know Anna Hazare.”

“Wah. I need people like you. I am fighting and fighting for so many years for this, but one man who looks bhookha (hungry) goes on hunger strike and takes credit.”

“I don’t know him. I know gangsters.”

“Woh corruption se ledenge? (Will they fight against corruption?)”

“They become gangsters because of corruption.”

“You said you don’t know corruption.”

“If you don’t know who your father is it does not mean you cannot be a father.”

“Wah. I will tell this on Rajat Sharma’s India TV. He keeps repeating my episode, it is like Comedy Circus, ha, ha, ha.”

“I am busy. Why you called.”

“Dil halka karne. (To lighten my stress.)”

“I don’t know stress.”

“Then you are my guru.”

“I am not Dhirubhai Ambani.”

“Pataa hai.”

“I am making new film: Ramgopal Verma ka Constitution. No one will be able to amend it.”

“The public will throw it out.”

“Who is public?”

- - -

The background:

Actor Anupam Kher must get it clear that you cannot eat your cake while baking it. And it would also do Ramdas Athavale’s RPI (Republican Party of India) members to understand that any slur on the Indian Constitution is not about Ambedkarites alone. While Babasaheb Ambedkar is the person who drafted it, we do not want a situation where his supporters, neo-Buddhists and Dalits are the only ones who rush to shelter its image, although this is not about image at all. It is also a bit ironical that those who are from groups that need protection should come out in support of laws that they themselves want updated.

Kher has defended himself:

“I have not made those remarks. I am really sad; someone should’ve verified with the person concerned or the news channels or backed it with documentary evidence before passing the privilege notice. It is not right to malign anyone without knowing the correct facts. I have not said that ‘Constitution should be thrown out’. All I said was there was a need for an amendment to the constitution. If MPs take 80 seconds to pass their salary bills, the government should do the same for the Lokpal Bill which is important.”

The Constitution is not a holy book and most people have not read it in its entirety. The Indian Constitution is a frame and the painting keeps changing. So, Mr. Kher cannot “throw” it out. However, the analogy he has used is immature. But it shows just how kneejerk reactions work. This was only one…

And Baba Ramdev is of course confused because he is feeling left out. 

Over the weekend I got almost 15 forwarded pieces giving a 'contrarian' view. Wow. This too is herd instinct when you cannot see the faulty discourse in the beginning and wait to ask the questions when you see 'like-minded' people doing so. This is not only hypocrisy, but reveals how many turncoats are there.

- - -

As for Anna Hazare, here's a quote:

"The work done by chief ministers of Bihar (Nitish Kumar) and Gujarat (Narendra Modi) should be done by chief ministers of all states. I am not in support of any party, but the work they (Modi and Nitish Kumar) have done at the grassroots level is needed. The rural development they have done should be imitated. I will not go into politics of this."

If this is not politics, then what is?

- - -

An abridged version of my April 7 piece has appeared in today's Khaleej Times

1 comment:

  1. I am glad I stuck my neck out early. Do read Hazare's comments on Modi towards the end of the post, if you have not seen it elsewhere already. Of course, he says he is against communalism...


Note: only a member of this blog may post a comment.